Tuesday, 19 June 2012

So I stand near the buffet and summerse myself in bree

Hello.

Here is the next bit of my story. It is half of chapter one. Please please please write your critism. Don't be scared, I am a very calm person, usually.


chapter one:

Tangie never had dreams like that. So vivid and three dimensional, like she could taste the air still, and almost feel a dull, constant pain throbbing through her t-shirt. Laughter and distant drunken singing tickled her ears and sparked memories of the dream. Minute details, the smell of oranges, that refused to let go of her. Like they insisted on drawing her back into the graveyard, like she had unfinished business that she didn't quite know how to complete. But of course the gurgling sound of a flushing toilet seized her from the trance and shoved her back into reality.

A twenty hour flight to Paris, complete with crying babies and persistent snoring was the perfect alarm clock.

Tangie Spoof had always pictured going away. Far away. Anywhere but here, she would tell herself. The Universe would open up and swallow her and thrust her into its wide open spaces of opportunities and adventure. Now finally she was going. But unfortunately she was going with an extraordinarily fat woman on her right , whose rolls didn't quite fit into the seat and often encroached into Tangie's personal space. And a short Italian man on her left, whose passionate swear words erupted from his mouth in between rumbling snores.

Her family sat in the seats across the aisle, peacefully asleep next to each other. There had been some confusion with the seats and Tangie as the oldest of the Spoof family had been volunteered to sit by herself. Her eyes started to gently close as a B grade rom com played in the background, filling her ears with fading American accents of actors who no one knew the name of.

Rapid French cursing shot into the empty space, punctuating jabs of piercing pain. The same orange smell suffocated her and damp soil caved in all around her. Panic engulfed her as she spat out dirt and blood. Someone was coming, She couldn't quite understand though. The words were ignored by her brain, it refused to listen, endeavouring to continue the graveyard expedition.

"Please be prepared for our descent."

Her stomach dropped and she jolted awake to see a clean, smiling flight attendant blinking confusedly at her. Clouds rushed past the window and her head churned, struggling to distinguish her strange dream from her reality . The plane jiggled in every direction, thrashing the passengers around as it plunged for the runway. It came to an abrupt halt just as Tangie vomited all over the Italian man.

He woke up in disgust , staring at carrot bits and the regurgitated mush puddle slushing around on his slick Armani suit. With a rude hand gesture he leapt up and left in a huff. Tangie had never vomited on anyone and hoped, quite passionately, that it would never happen again. A revolting aftertaste fresh in her mouth and sagging bags under her eyes, Tangie stepped off the plan breathing in uncontaminated, BO free oxygen.

It was with that she arrived in the most romantic city on earth.
***


Also, does anybody have any fantastic books or music I should check out?? I am in a new music/books mood.

That's all I really have to say.

LOVE CARLA:)





12 comments:

  1. First; thank you so much for stopping by, reading and taking your time to leave the comment.
    This chapter sounds like a fantastic intro to new bestseller!Really like it!GOSH, Tangie seems so..I don't know..Quite happy leaving place where she used to be and going to the most romantic city in the whole world, doesn't she?
    P.S. While I was reading this, in background was playing Pearl Jam's 'Black' so If you want to, check it out!
    P.P.S. What kind of music/book genre/or anything are you interested in?
    I would recommend you to read We Children from Zoo bus-station(or Wir kinder vom Bahnhof Zoo- one of my all time favorites:)
    I'll be reading you, and I can't wait to see next post!
    xo

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  2. Hi Carla,
    my name is Ariel and I am also a 13 year old fashion blogger! I would love it if you would check out my blog for I have just developed a huge obsession for yours! :)
    http://quitecouture.blogspot.ca/
    XOXO
    Ariel

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  3. My first real post is written!If you are interested or bored, check it out!
    xoxo
    Yours truly, L.

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  4. I am LOVIN' your story! :D No criticisms, and, coming from me, that's a great compliment. I am a VERY picky person when it comes to this stuff. ;P
    Books to read: I have to stop myself from listing every book imaginable, so here goes! :D
    Harry Potter
    Percy Jackson and the Olympians
    Anything by Tamora Pierce (Especially The Song of the Lioness and The Protector of the Small)
    Fablehaven
    Gamer Girl
    Anything by Shannon Hale
    Anything by Gail Carson Levine
    The Hunger Games
    Gregor the Overlander
    The Thoroughbred Series (ESPECIALLY if you like horses/if you're horse crazy ;) )
    The Secret Language of Girls+The Kind of Friends We Used to Be

    Music: I'll alphabetize this list for you. ;D
    Adam Lambert
    Adele
    Brooke White
    Bruno Mars
    The Cars
    Chris Rene
    The Civil Wars
    Colbie Caillat
    Coldplay
    Corrinne Bailey Rae
    Cyndi Lauper
    Daughtry
    David Cook
    Elliot Yamin
    Fantasia Barrino
    Gavin DeGraw
    Anything that Glee has done
    Stereo Hearts by Gym Class Heroes Featuring Adam Levine
    Indigo Girls
    Katy Perry
    Kelly Clarkson
    Kris Allen
    Lady Antebellum
    You and I by Lady Gaga (I HATE Gaga, but LOVE this song)! :D
    Lee Dewyze
    Maroon 5
    Summer Rain by Matthew Morisson
    Michael Buble (Even if you hate jazz, you'll LOVE him)! :D
    Party in the USA by Miley Cyrus (Same situation with Gaga)
    OneRepublic
    Owl City
    P!nk
    Paula Abdul
    Phillip Phillips (Don't let the name fool you) ;)
    Queen
    Sara Bareilles
    Selena Gomez
    Dynamite by Tai Cruz
    Taylor Swift (ESPECIALLY White Horse, Safe and Sound, Eyes Open, Enchanted, Haunted, Long Live, Teardrops On My Guitar, Our Song, and Today Was A Fairytale. As you can see, I am a HUGE Taylor Swift fan)! :D ;)
    Train
    U2
    A Thousand Years by Christina Perri
    ANYTHING from The Hunger Games: Songs from District 12
    Weird Al Yankovic
    Hope this Helps! :D

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  5. You are actually amazing!
    When you become a famous writer will you remember me your poor cousin :P

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  6. You are ridiculously good at writing!!!!! Some good books are bambert and the missing stories( u can borrow it off me if u want) and water for elephants (mum read it and loved it. She read some to me and it was great) some good music is the band two door cinema club

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  7. ...... Eddie vender, the police, rem, empire of the sun, band of horses, Peter Murray, Paul Simon, and I'll give you more on saturday. Lots of love charlixxx

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  8. OH, that means I'm not the only one with that weird/awkward/whatever habits. You're my soulmate:'D

    Check out- Lana del Rey, one of the rare new artists I really do like.

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  9. I have to say I'm actually pretty impressed with your writing, you have a really nice style, I'm also so glad that it didn't turn out to be Harry Potter fan fiction, which I dread anyone posting online :p I say read the classics! That's what I'm doing at the moment, it turns out that they're classic for a reason and actually pretty good! To Kill a Mocking Bird was addictive reading for me!
    Charlotte

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    Replies
    1. Huzzah for Harry Potter! :D I totally agree with you. Anybody who posts fan fiction or tries to do a spoof (which are ALWAYS really really dumb) makes me cringe. :P J.K. Rowling is a genius and maybe some of her genius will seep into me and my writing! :D
      PS: Check my blog out! :D

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  10. Good story so far, it already captured my attention. Good luck with the rest of it and can't wait to find out what the dreams mean. Also, Ed Sheeran is someone who I am currently istening to on rotation as well as Regina Spektor. I don't know if I would call either of them new, but they are good to listen to.

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  11. I have new post here, so if you are bored or either interested, check it out!
    xo, L.

    http://fashion-babel.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete